Hey all!

Well, it's been a while since I last posted, and that's because I've been extremely busy!

Whoa, just read my last post. What a mess! Luckily, I'm quite a tidy person, and have been cleaning a lot of it up...

Work's still as up n down as ever (O reckons that that's just the way things are with me, but hey). I got all set to go on a work trip, which was then cancelled by my boss at the last minute, annoying the people who wanted me to go. But who gets blamed? Not him! Me! Our test equipment's been out of action for 6 weeks, rather than the supposed 1 week, delaying me behind quite significantly. I have no plans for the next year defined due to costs, so no more new work is visible. My immediate bosses, including the one I liked, have been contradictory and messing me around. I still love my job, but it's turning into one big fed-up-ness which I'm finding hard to deal with. Maybe time to start looking elsewhere...?

So the big news. I've seen sense about my situation with O and T, and you'll probably be pleased to know, it's all about T. O, romantically, is out of the picture. I decided this at a party we were at, when he acted very cockishly, really big headed, and later I found out he'd taken something to help the party move along quicker. This is quite a big deal-breaker for me in general, but I realised - this is O. He's never going to change. He's never going to grow up. And this is exactly why I'm not with him anymore. We're the best of friends, and he still has his blips (we were out and about the other night, and I was having a bit of a miserable time, when he hugged me and told me he loved me to bits). I thought that was quite sweet. When the time and the right girl comes along, he's going to be a great boyfriend. And there's plenty of window-shopping from others - my housemate G think's he's hot (I'm not sure if she knows we have a history together), my housemate D adn him are perfectly suited, very similar mannerisms, but I think he's got a real soft spot for a friend of ours, a girl called A down where he lives, which I'd love to see blossom!) He is just never going to be the perfect boyfriend for me, which is fine, because I have one of my own...

T's perfect for me in so many ways, and I've finally given up the game, opened my eyes and given it my all. I love him so much. We still have just the one big argument under our belt (a rite of passage, methinks), I love his parents and rest of his family (and I hope they love me too!), he's drop-dead gorgeous, incredibly smart, sweet, considerate, generous...ahh, the list goes on. I decided about a month ago that I wanted to grab a last minute holiday deal, so we're jetting off tomorrow morning on a sun-filled holiday, with a temperature above 40 degrees! Eeeek! I'm very excited about this, for more than one reason...

T's asked me to move in with him!

"So soon?" I may hear you cry (the date in mind is the end of September, which will bring our relationship duration to 11 months - maybe some of you would think that he took his time to ask!). But it's something we really both want. I'm quite surprised and flattered, given his ex - they took 5 years before they felt they "had" to move in together...heehee :p It's not like that with us - there's definitely no feeling like we "have" to do this - normally I wouldn't even have considered moving in together after eight months! But hey, each relationship is different.

T's given me about a month to make a decision on whether we go for it now, or wait a while. There are several dilemmas to this...

1) Is it too soon? It will get on my nerves if this keeps coming our way from our friends. But it's a minor thing.
2) What will it do to our social life? I haven't told many people about our plans, but I have told O (mean, some people might say, given his blips??) Either way, this is the kicker from him. He reckons it will disappear, I reckon it will get better. At the moment, I don't spend much time with my housemates, who I love to bits (see point 4) but I reckon being with T 24/7 will make me go and visit them more often. Plus there's still the trips to see O and the evening classes I do (next one - French!) So I don't think this will be an issue at all.
3) Money - will I have enough saved by then? My car stuff (MOT, service, insurance) is due in August, which is always financially draining. And we want to go for an unfurnished place, which will mean we'll move in with practically nothing. I'm sure I can get around this somehow.
4) Here's the kicker. After years of searching, I've finally found decent housemates in G and D (and J, who was here before G, wasn't half-bad either!) If I move in with T, I not only lose some socialising and friendship building with them, but if it doesn't work out with T, I can probably never go back to this house and with the girls (We have a fantastic garden that I've done a lot of work in too, but that's OK - I think I can part with it once summer has gone).

I'm doing a lot of "judging" at the moment - I thought I couldn't bear to leave the girls when they came in the other night and started chatting wildly with me into the early hours, but then, D is messy at times (to the point of annoyance) and G can be quite abrupt (she speaks her mind, but also left this morning without saying "goodbye" or "have fun on your holiday" to me). But then I've been in this house a year come August, maybe it's time to move on. I'd love to have my own place with my items not all in my room, but dotted around my house. As my friends say at work, moving on from shared houses is "natural progression".

I haven't told G or D of my plans yet - I'm going to see how this holiday goes first. A holiday was the killer for O and I, despite the fact we lived together for 6 months quite happily (there was other people around, though) so I think a holiday's a good judge for me of whether we get on well enough 24/7 to give it a shot. I think we'll be fine - I don't think we'll end up killing each other, plus we have very similar housekeeping rules (our house is going to be spotless!)

I really hope it works out, and that I come to a decision about G and D. At the moment I'm oscillating around the middle of staying with them, or moving in with T this year.

We will see, we will see, we will see...

I'll keep you posted - I'm off on holiday!

FPB